KGB, column not yet published

Here's the next column waiting to be published as soon as the zine is back on its feet:

Hello again from the middle of the Bavarian nowhere...I am still sitting in Germany, enjoying the quiet life. My son is getting bigger and more handsome every day and he already is super-clever.

I believe he will grow up to save the world. Or at least rule it with firm hand…

I’ll support whichever.

 But before that we will have to return to Tokyo… can’t let him spend his childhood here.

Today I would like to introduce one band that was more important to my becoming Punk than any other. 

I guess everyone is infected with the Punk virus in a similar way: after years of listening to whatever your parents listen  to or what you hear on the radio/TV you eventually come across a band that has the energy to pull you along with them. Then you start looking for other stuff like that and before you know it you spend all your money on your record collection (I am talking 80s here…).  

For me the bands that started everything was German Punkrock overlords Die Ärzte and, just as big, Die Toten Hosen. Probably 90% of all young Punks back in the late 80s in Germany started like that before they moved on to the old British and American heroes or the more hardcore stuff from Germany.

But for me there was one more band equally influential: KGB

I spent my Punkrock youth in a German university town called Tübingen, which I still think is one of the nicest places to live in Germany. Despite being rather small, it has always had a very vibrant nightlife since nearly half the population are students and it has also always been a haven for free thinkers, leftists and alternative lifestyles. No wonder that the list of public figures who have lived there is probably longer than in any other German city. From poets and writers, the likes of Hegel, Hauff, Hölderlin, Bebel, Mörike  to RAF activists like Gudrun Ensslin and Eva Haule. I should probably leave out the fact that even the last pope has studied there, too keep up the good image…

And Tübingen has also always had a nice little Punk scene whose most successful band till date was KGB. Before they split in 1991, I probably saw them in every bar/pub/club that had enough space for a drum set and a few amps. Hell, I’m getting all sentimental just writing about it…

They have toured most of Europe, as well as the States in ’86 and played and toured  with bands like Circle Jerks, Zero Boys, Rhythm Pigs, Bad Brains, D.O.A, Greg Sage, T.S.O.L., Bad Religion, Bollock Brothers, Stiff Little Fingers or The Toy Dolls.

Musically they are basically a German version of old US Punkrock. Not too hardcore but neither too slow and with nice melodies. Most comparable to The Freeze, Toxic Reasons  or the Zero Boys.

Contrary to many other bands of the time they managed to write clever lyrics too. In a former column I already complained about German bands from the era not being able to come up with lyrics that wouldn’t make you blush when you played it loud. KGB was one of the few exceptions.

In the late 80s, KGB was the centre of the Tübingen Punk scene and when they split, they left a hole that hasn’t been filled till today.

All members tried out different projects after the split, most mentionable would be Church of Confidence by former guitar Player Uli, who now owns the most famous Rock’n’Roll venue in Berlin, the Wild at Heart. Church of Confidence are ok, but nothing more. Obviously very Social Distortion influenced.

In 1992 KGB was revived by singer Hannes, two years after the split, with a completely different line-up and it never felt the same. In addition, Hannes felt like he had to expand the musical bandwidth, which resulted in a horrible funk-rock crossover thingy. At least that was my impression back then. If I listened to it now it might sound different… might…

Anyway, before their first split, KGB put out numerous singles and three great albums:

-          - Letzte Bestellung

-          - Kein Grund zur Beruhigung

-          - Einmal rund um die Sonne

So check these out if you can get a hold of them. 

Also, I can’t talk about Tübingen without mentioning its most famous location for live-shows and alternative culture: the Epple-Haus. This former squat has been a self-governing community centre for over 40 years now and is still doing shows and events.

So if you happen to be in Tübingen, places to go to are:

-          - Epple-Haus  (Karlstrasse 13)

-          - Blauer Salon (Münzgasse 13)

-          - Last Resort (Mühlstrasse 20)

Here's KGB's homepage:

http://www.kgbgermany.de/

I believe they still play sporadically.

Kotzreiz, column not yet published

Alright, since the fanzine in Japan is being delayed, I will post two unpublished columns here first.
It seems there is a bit of financial trouble and I hope they get it together again.
If you are reading this in Japan and you want to publish an ad (helping them finance the zine), here's the link:

http://old-fashion.net/advertisers.html
 

Ok... column...here we go:



Warm greetings from cold Germany. The leafs have fallen off the trees and temperatures are dropping towards zero already... I’m looking forward to a white winter. Not like in Tokyo, where it’s chaos as soon as one centimetre of snow falls – we are talking about half a meter over here.

However, if Germans know how to do one thing well, apart from making sausages and beer, then it is building houses! Perfectly isolated, it is warm and cosy inside, even at minus 20 degrees outside.

I have been over here two months now and I am already starting to miss Tokyo! I want to ride my scooter through Tokyo, eat some decent Ramen, go drinking with my crew, get hammered at a Punk show in Koenji or Shimokita, go to Karaoke and then sleep on the train home! That’s my perfect day!
Anyway, no time for whining – time to get down to business, which is introducing German bands.

And today I actually chose a band that is still playing! So no obscure 80s stuff but young and fresh!
I am talking about Berliners “Kotzreiz”. When I first listened to them, there was this feeling of not knowing whether they were being serious or making fun of themselves but I instantly liked it.
 One of the things I hate most is when people take themselves too seriously. I believe everything and everyone should be allowed to be made fun of, Hitler just as well as Ghandi...

That’s why I like Kotzreiz. Every cliché of Punk in Germany is being made fun of in lyrical genius. Exactly the type of lyrics that leaves a huge percentage of listeners behind, but those who know how to take it with a grin on their faces. The last time I had that feeling was with early 90s Hamburg band “Human Punx”. Their irony was pretty obvious but they were still subtle enough to be taken seriously by some.
If you get the chance you should check out their album "Nietzsches Schreibmaschine". Epic title, by the way.

What Kotzreiz are within the German Punkrock scene, Hardskin would be for English Oi and Steel Panther and Spinal Tap for Metal.
All those bands (except Spinal Tap maybe) have in common that they make fun of what they are actually part of.
Kotzreiz are Punks and they are rooted in the Punkrock scene. But especially within the Punk scene there is so much stupidity that is worth being ridiculed. However, they never lose respect for the Punk thing itself.
So different from some silly comedian who puts a safety pin in his ear and a fake Mohawk on his head in order to make jokes about punks, those guys actually know what they are talking about.
Their latest record is called “Punk bleibt Punk” (Punk will be Punk) and lyrically they deal with anything punk-related, like riding on public transportation without paying for a ticket (Fahrschein), collecting empty bottles for money (Pfandflaschenmessi), hating Mondays (Montagscheisstag), loving alcohol (Pfeffi Graf, der Klügere kippt nach), hating Emos (Emosau),  loving Berlin (Berlin), hating work (Punk bleibt Punk) and so on.
However, all their comedy wouldn’t work if their music sucked. Fortunately it doesn’t. Within their Punkrock minimalism they have a feel for good melodies and choruses. The band they reminded me most of musically is Turbonegro during their Ass Cobra / Apocalypse Dudes phase. Especially the “Ohohoh” choruses sound a lot like them. But they also know their Deutschpunk back-catalogue and Vorkriegsjugend are no strangers to them.
All in all it is straight and simple Punkrock with catchy melodies. Raw enough not to sound over-produced but not too lo-fi. Anyway the perfect vessel to transport their overdrawn lyrics.

Go get their records:

“Du machst die Stadt kaputt”
“Punk bleibt Punk”

Both released on AGP (Aggressive Punk Produktionen), label of Rejected Youth singer Matze.

Oh, and the best thing last: I will be a dad soon. Long I have pondered but too precious is my DNA to let it go to waste...

 

Lolitas / Stereo Total, Old Fashion No 7, January 2013

La Musique Francaise

Hello everyone from the Hinterland between the Allgäu and the Schwäbische Alb. Castles, picturesque villages, cows and sheep… that’s where I ended up!  

 I have been here for work for about a month now and while it is nice to enjoy nature, the Punkrock factor is around zero. Though I have to say that I saw a guy with a Mohawk walking to the station the other day, so I guess I would have to raise it to about 7.6%.

みんな、シュワービッシュ・アルプ（※南ドイツの山々）からこんにちは！城や絵みたいにきれいな村と牛や羊たち…ここが俺が行き着いた世界だよ。仕事でここにきて1ヶ月、自然は楽しめるけど、パンクの要素は全くゼロだ…。でもこの間、駅の近くでモヒカンの奴が歩いてるのを見かけたから、パンク度は7.6%ぐらいになったかも（笑）。

One thing I really enjoy over here are German Thermalbäder (Onsen).  Unlike in Japan, nobody gives a shit about tattoos. And if you go into the sauna area everyone is naked. I mean really naked – ladies and gentlemen. You can swing your ding and it’s totally ok. My wife calls it Hentai-country…

ここで本当に楽しんでることの1つはドイツのテルメ（温泉）だ。日本と違ってＴＡＴＴＯに文句する奴は誰もいない。そしてサウナエリアに入ったらみんな裸だ。つまりほんとに男も女も「裸」なんだ。アレをぶらぶらさせてても全然問題ないってこと（笑）。俺の奥さんは「やっぱり変態の国だね…」って言ってるよ！

I also enjoy German food again. And no, it’s not only sausages and beer. We have Spaetzle, Maultaschen, Leberkaese, Fleischkuechle, Kartoffelsalat, Flaedlesuppe, Gaisburger Marsch, and lots more. Each of which easily kicks Natto’s ass!

あとドイツ料理も楽しんでる。いっとくけどドイツはソーセージとビアだけじゃないよ！シュペッツレ（※）、マウルタッシェン（※ドイツ風餃子）、レバーケーゼ（※）フライシュキューヒレ（※）カトーフェルザラート（※）、フレードレズッペ（※）ガイスブーガー・マルシュ（※）とかね。どれも納豆より全然うまいよ！

Anyway, I am not here to start a food battle between Japan and Germany (also because I sadly have to admit that Japan would win...) but to talk about good German bands.

ここで日本ＶＳドイツの食べ物バトルをしたいんじゃないから（そして悲しいことにたぶんそれだったら日本が勝つね…）、そろそろドイツのバンドの話をしよう！

Today I would like to introduce the one and only Chanson-Punk band in Germany: The Lolitas. And, since they are no more, also the band that rose from their ashes: Stereo Total.

今日はドイツで唯一のシャンソンパンク・バンドを紹介するよ。The Lolitas(ザ・ロリータス)と、そのバンドが解散した後、ロリータスのメンバーでやったStereo Total（ステレオ・トータル）もね。

But let’s start with the Lolitas. Formed in the mid 80s in Berlin, they did something that was quite unique in Germany: mixing French Chansons with Punkrock . The band was founded by French expat Francoise Cactus and members were Olga, Tutti Frutti, Coco und Tex Morton. Apart from Cactus, most notably would be Tex Morton who has been in numerous bands since the 80s (among others Rockabilly band "Sunny Domestosz" and absolutely fantastic and underrated "Lüde und die Astros") and is currently playing for Mad Sin.

でもまずはロリータスからはじめよう。80年代半ばにベルリンで結成されて、ドイツではかなり珍しいことをやってた。フランスのシャンソンとパンクのミックスだ。そのバンドのメンバーは、ドイツに住んでたフランス人、Francoise Cactus(フランソワーズ・カクトゥス)、Olga（オルガ）Tutti Frutti（トゥッティー・フルッティー）、Coco（ココ）とTex Morton（テックス・モートン）だった。カクトゥス以外のメンバーは80年代から数え切れないほどたくさんのバンドをやっていて、特にテックス・モートンはロカビリーバンドのSunny Domestosz(サニー・ドメストスズ)、（絶対すごいのに過小評価されていた）Lüde und die Astros（ルーデ・ウンド・ディー・アストロズ）をやって、最近はMad Sin(マッド・シン)でプレイしてるよ。

Most striking about their sound was Cactuses French-accented English. You can never tell when it is real and when she's faking it. She is however well aware of it and therefore one of their records is called “My English sucks”, on which they only do cover versions (e.g. Dead Boys and Misfits).

彼らのサウンドで一番印象的なのは、カクトゥスのフランス訛りの英語だ。それを聞いてもきっとそれがわざとなのか、本気でやってるのか絶対わからないだろう。彼女はそれをよくわかっていたから、彼らのレコードの１つは”My English sucks”というタイトルで、それにはカバーバージョン(例えば Dead Boys とか Misfits)だけが入っている。

The Lolitas always kept it simple and that love for minimalism continued in Francoise Catuses next band Stereo Total. I believe that they should be known to one or two Japanese too: they have acquired quite some fame over the 20 years they have been playing and they have always had a thing for Japan. Not only have they toured and released some of their records there (on Appareil Photo) but they also composed the soundtrack for Japanese Pink movie “Underwater love”. They also did a cover version of Plastics’ “I love you, oh no!”. However, they renamed it “I love you Ono”…

ロリータスはいつもシンプルでミニマリズムを愛していて、フランソワーズ・カクトゥスの次のバンド、ステレオ・トータルにもそれは引き継がれた。彼らは日本でも知ってる人がいるはずだと思う。彼らは20年以上やってかなり人気になり、いつもなにかしら日本に関係していた。彼らは日本でツアーしただけでなく、 アパレルフォト（Appareil Photo）というレーベルから何枚かレコードも発売した。でも彼らはまた日本のピンク映画　”アンダーウォーター・ラブ（Underwater love）”のサウンドトラックも担当した。彼らはプラスティックスの’ “I love you, oh no!”をカバーした。曲名は’ “I love you, Ono”に変えていたけど…

While the Lolitas were basically a Punkrock band, Stereo Total has a much wider musical range. They describe themselves as:

ロリータスは基本的にパンクロックバンドだったけど、ステレオ・トータルはもっと音楽の幅が広かった。自分たちの音楽のことをこう言ってるよ。

40 % Chanson, 20 % R'n'R, 10 % Punkrock, 3 % DAF-Sequenzer, 4 % Jacques Dutronc-Rhythmique, 7 % Brigitte Bardot and Serge Gainsbourg, 1,5 % Cosmonaute, 10 % really old synthesizers, 10 % 8-bit Amiga-sampling, 10 % transistor amplifier, 1 % really expensive and advanced instruments

『シャンソン40%、ロックンロール20%、パンクロック10%、ダフ・シークエンサー3%、シャック・デュトロン・リトミック4%、ブリジッド・バルドーとセルジュ・ゲンズブール7%、コスモノート1.5%、すごい古いシンセサイザー10%、アミガ（古いＰＣ）サンプリング8ビットの10%、トランジスタ・アンプ10%、すっごい高くて最先端の楽器は1%だけ。』

Basically, they are very minimalistic, also owed to the fact that it’s only two people: Francoise Cactus and Brezel Göring. 

ステレオ・トータルはとてもミニマリスティックで、実際にメンバーもフランソワーズ・カクトゥスとBrezel Göring（ブレッツェル・グューリング）の2人だけだった。

The one main thing the Lolitas and Stereo Total have in common is that they don’t take themselves seriously and that makes them so charming. So whether you want simple pure Punkrock with female vocals in French-accented English or you prefer the easy-listening genre mix of Stereo Total, they both deserve to be heard.

ロリータスとステレオ・トータルに共通する１つのメインのことは、ふざけながらバンドをやっていてそれが彼らの魅力だっていうことだ。もし単に純粋にフランス訛りの英語の女ヴォーカルのパンクロックを聴きたいか、ジャンルをミックスしたイージーリスニングなステレオ・トータルを聴きたいかによるけど、どっちも聴く価値があるよ！

The Lolitas released their records primarily in Germany and France, so I don’t know if they are easy to come across in Japan. 

ロリータスはドイツとフランスで最初にレコードを発売したから、日本で簡単に見つけられるかどうかわからない。

Stereo Total records shouldn’t be too hard to find. But if you go for Punkrock, you will be disappointed. 

ステレオ・トータルのレコードは日本でも見つけるのはそんなに難しくないだろうけど、パンクだけ好きだったらちょっとがっかりかもしれないね。

次のコラムのテーマはまだ考え中だけど、絶対おもしろくなる（はず）だから、楽しみにしてて！チュース！